At long last, here’s the full version of The Beaver Song from “How I Met Your Mother,” featuring Robin Sparkles and Jessica Glitter:

Photo: Ron P. Jaffe/FOX (via CBS)

The big night came Monday as Robin Sparkles returned to “How I Met Your Mother” for the third time. As we reminded you yesterday, Robin Sparkles is the Canadian teen-idol alter-ego of the show’s Canadian TV morning show host Robin Sherbatsky, who is played by Canadian actress Cobie Smulders.

Robin Sparkles’ big return came in the form of an episode of “Space Teens,” which Barney discovered and parsed out in brief segments throughout Monday night’s “HIMYM” episode.

What we learned was that Robin’s persona actually came out of this kids’ show, in which she co-starred with her best friend Jessica Glitter (played by Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger). In the show, Robin and Jessica were lost in space and used math to solve crimes. It contained significant sexual undertones, including slow-motion shots of Robin and Jessica bouncing up and down and playing with a joystick in tremendously suggestive fashion. It culminated in the singing of a song about friendship, “The Beaver Song,” which repeats the line “Two beavers are better than one.”

Do you agree? Check out the episode here:

Photo: Ron P. Jaffe/FOX (via CBS)

She’s having a moment, and we’re along for the ride. Tonight, Robin Sparkles, the Canadian teen idol alter-ego of Robin Scherbatsky, Cobie’s character on “How I Met Your Mother” returns.

Got that straight? She’s so Canadian, she’s basically three Canadians at once! Smulders, a Vancouver native, plays Robin Scherbatsky, a Canadian-born TV morning show host in New York, who had a brief moment as a Debbie Gibson-like teen pop star in Canada with hits such as “Let’s Go to the Mall” and “Sandcastles in the Sand.”

Another layer of Robin Sparkles’ past is peeled away in tonight’s episode when Barney finds a tape of an old Canadian TV show, “Space Teens,” which stars Robin and her cohort Glitter, played by guest star Nicole Scherzinger. Here’s a quick clip:

REPOST ALERT: It’s already well over 2 million views on YouTube, but for those who have not had a chance to see this instant classic…

Hot on the heels of the 2010 Winter Olympics, where curling once again captured our imaginations, even if some of weren’t entirely clear on what was going on, a bunch of nude and semi-nude female curlers are being included in a calendar intended to raise money for the athletes.

While the 36-month calendar is filled with photos of nice-looking ladies, the big question on everyone’s mind seems to be whether 44-year-old Cheryl Bernard of the Canadian Olympic Team will be featured.

There was a rumor that an unidentified woman on the cover of a previous version (her back is to the camera) was Bernard, but Bernard has reportedly denied it’s her, and she now tells People.com that she won’t be stripping for the camera anytime soon.

“I think it’s okay for women to pose if they want to, but it’s not my thing,” she tells the site. “But it is nice to be recognized for what you do in your sport and for our fitness level, but I don’t pay attention to the other stuff.”

She went on to say that posing nude is “not … necessary in my life. It’s not on my Bucket List.”

UPDATE: For those seeking photos and ordering information, you can find some of the pics here, and you can order the calendar here from the photographer’s Web site.

By Gordon Holmes
Special to Canadian of the Week

From Alberta’s Hart Family to Quebec’s Rougeau Brothers to Ontario’s Edge and Christian, the tradition of Canadian wrestling is full of larger-than-life personalities and unforgettable matches. Join us every week as we count down to Wrestlemania XXVI by taking a look at the Great White North’s finest contributions to the squared circle.

Editor’s Note: The “Modern Era” is defined as the period of wrestling that exists from
SummerSlam 1988 to the present day. Why 1988? Because that’s when I started watching wrestling. I know, I’m lame.

Previous picks:
10. Andrew “Test” Martin
9. John “Earthquake” Tenta
8. Lance Storm
7. Christian
6. Chris Benoit

5: Trish Stratus
Height: 5’4”
Weight: 125 lbs.
Hometown: Toronto, Ontario
Greatest Match: Stratus vs. Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley – No Way Out 2001

If this were a ranking of the top women wrestlers of the modern era, Trish Stratus would be a no-brainer pick for the top spot.

Of the handful of women who have been legitimate draws in the past few decades, none of them have combined the superstar look, promo-cutting ability, and in-ring talent into one package the way Trish Stratus has. Sable had a million-dollar look but couldn’t talk or work. Lita could throw an impressive highspot or three when she needed to, but couldn’t cut a promo to save her life. And Chyna…well…I never quite got the appeal of Chyna…maybe the less said about her the better.

So, if Trish is the undeniable best female wrestler of the past twenty years, I think it’s fair to say she’s the Hulk Hogan, Steve Austin, or Rock of women wrestlers.

But how do you rank a woman wrestler against male wrestlers?

Sure, the in-ring and microphone basics are the same, but from a business standpoint, the pressure and drawing ability of a female wrestler isn’t as great as that of a male wrestler. Not to open up a sexual politics debate, but from a money-making standpoint the Women’s Champion isn’t as important to the company as the male World Champion. The Women’s Champion rarely main events shows and is rarely given enough time to put on a classic match.

I’m not saying that’s the way it should be, I’m saying that’s the way it is.

Comparing Hulk Hogan, Steve Austin, and The Rock to Trish Stratus isn’t exactly fair. It’s like comparing apples to super hot oranges.

So here sits Trish, arguably the greatest female wrestler of all time sitting at the number five spot on a list of the best Canadian wrestlers of the modern era.

Is it fair? Probably not. Is that the way I’m going to leave it? Yes.

That being said, Trish deserves credit for much more than her wrestling character and in-ring ability. She was The Miz before The Miz was The Miz.

Wait, what?

Basically The Miz and Trish got their jobs based on something other than their wrestling-based talents. The Miz was a minor celebrity from his appearance on MTV’s “The Real World.” Trish was hired because she was a nuclear-hot fitness model.

Both could have coasted for a while and enjoyed some success without ever improving. We’ve seen it before. Yes, I’m looking at you, Maven.

However, neither was content to rest on their laurels. Both worked to improve all facets of the craft. And now, The Miz walks around with three championship belts and Trish Stratus is considered to be the best female wrestler of all time (or a close second to the Fabulous Moolah.)

So, why didn’t Trish follow the standard eye candy route that The Kat and Terri Runnels paved for her? Because she’s a wrestler.

While Diva Search contestants were signing with the WWE because it was a paycheck that kept them out of strip clubs, Trish signed because she was a wrestler.

And by wrestler, I mean someone who when they enter the ring and are about to do something violent doesn’t think “Gee, I hope this doesn’t hurt too bad.”

They think, “This better look awesome.”

It may sound simple, but it’s not a mindset many outside the business have.

As someone with a wrestling background, I’ve been asked several times why I’d allow myself to be smacked with a steel chair or thrown through a table. The answer is simple; the mental pain of something looking terrible is way worse than the physical pain of something that looked awesome.

I’m not special. I’d say 95 percent of wrestlers have this same attitude.

Trish Stratus is a perfect example of this. She’s missing a knuckle from a match with Victoria (now Tara). She never had it repaired because it looks cool and she likes to tell the story. When given the choice of experiencing a hand taser or a shooting taser on the dreadful reality show “Armed and Famous” she chose the more painful shooting taser because it’d look better.

And that’s just one facet of what Trish brought to the table.

In fact, I’d go so far as to say if Vince McMahon were allowed to head into a lab and create the perfect Diva; she’d have the looks of Trish Stratus, the attitude of Trish Stratus, and the work rate of Trish Stratus.

The only thing I’d change? The catchphrase: “Stratusfaction.” I’ve always kinda hated that.

Gordon Holmes is the wrestling correspondent for Comcast.net’s SlamCast wrestling coverage and the “Survivor” correspondent for Fancast.com. He was also trained to take a beating by WWE Hall of Famer Afa “The Wild Samoan” Anoa’i. You can follow Gordon on Twitter at twitter.com/gordonholmes.

“Lost” is back and as it heads into its final hours with more buzz than ever it’s time to honor our favorite Oceanic 815 survivor as Canadian of the Week.

Evangeline Lilly had never held a lead role before she captivated viewers as fugitive Kate Austen who was among the few survivors of arguably the most famous fictional plane crash in entertainment history. But over six seasons, she’s made a name for herself as an action lady and the central figure in the greatest love triangle on the island.

Now, as the sixth and final season kicks off and the countdown to the highly anticipated finale begins, it’s worth taking a look at how far Lilly has come from the now-infamous LiveLinks commercials that reportedly still air in Canada.

Unfortunately for Lilly’s fans, she’s talking about calling it quits on acting once the show ends. She told Eonline’s Kristen Dos Santos that she’s just “not passionate about acting the way you probably should be to call yourself an actor.”

Lilly said she’d like “to have some quiet space,” and that she would like to “drop off the radar a little bit and enjoy a little bit of normalcy again.”

See the full interview here:

For now, we’ve still got her and we’ve got a few more months of what will certainly go down as one of the most unique, epic and engaging series in American television history.

Check out a teaser for Tuesday night’s episode, and fasten your seat belts!

RadarOnline.com is reporting that Pam Anderson has sealed a deal to compete on the next season of “Dancing with the Stars.”

“She really wanted to do the show and the show thought it was a great idea,” a source told RadarOnline.com exclusively.

It wouldn’t be the first time a contestant with Playboy connections has taken to the dance floor, and they’ve had drastically different levels of success.

April 1997 Playmate of the Month turned soap opera star Kelly Monaco won the first season of the show. Meanwhile Shanna Moakler, who was Playmate of the Month in December 2001, was eliminated second (only after Tucker Carlson) in the third season.

Hugh Hefner’s ex Holly Madison was eliminated third in Season 8, after jumping in at the last minute for an injured contestant just days before the competition began.

How do you think Pam Anderson will fare on the show?

Montreal’s Emmanuelle Chriqui is the most desirable woman in the world, according to AskMen.com’s annual reader poll.

The Web site released its 99 Most Desirable Women list on Tuesday and Chriqui, who claimed the top spot, was joined by five other Canadians on the list.

According to the site, six million online votes were cast over a six-week period, and the poll aims to reflect what the “modern man” seeks “in his ideal companion.”

Chriqui is best known for her role as Sloan on HBO’s “Entourage,” who is the on-again, off-again girlfriend of Vincent Chase’s friend manager Eric. The list, ironically, ended with another “Entourage” girlfriend as Jamie-Lynn Sigler, who plays herself as Turtle’s girlfriend on the show, landed spot No. 99.

Chriqui, who ranked 12th on the list last year and 40th in 2008, told AskMen.com, “Hearing what that vote is made of is the biggest compliment of all because it’s not just about being ‘hot’ but about being a well-rounded woman. That’s really empowering — people recognize that I care about other things.”

Five more Canadians made the list, although one-time frequenter of such rankings Elisha Cuthbert of Calgary was nowhere to be found, nor was Vancouver’s Evangeline Lilly.

Malin Akerman: Moving down the list of Canadians, Malin Akerman landed 26th on the list. Akerman wasn’t on the list last year, but popped into the 60th spot in 2008 after appearing with Katherine Heigl in “27 Dresses.” Akerman landed in the No. 4 spot on Maxim’s Hot 100 list last year.

We’re still trying to forgive her for “Couples Retreat,” but Akerman was one of the bright spots of “Watchmen” and “The Proposal.” Akerman was born in Sweden, but grew up in Ontario, where she moved when she was 2.

Grace Park: Actress Grace Park placed 46th on the list after getting some attention at Number Eight on the revival of “Battlestar Galactica” (more from that show in a moment). Park also landed a role alongside Benjamin Bratt on A&E’s “The Cleaner,” which was canceled in September.

Park, who was born in Los Angeles, but moved to Vancouver when she was 22 months old, continues to work in Canada. She’s currently starring in “The Border” on CBC. Park had never made AskMen.com’s list before.

Coco Rocha: Up-and-coming model Coco Rocha, who was born in Toronto but grew up in Richmond, B.C., came in 59th on the list. The model has already established herself as outspoken, having publicly taken stands against eating disorders in the modeling industry and making it know that she doesn’t care much for Paris, which happens to be the fashion capital of the world.

This was Rocha’s first time on AskMen.com’s list.

Tricia Helfer: Another “Battlestar Galactica” star, Tricia Helfer came in 70th place on the list after turning heads as Number Six. Helfer also plays a recurring role as Michael Westen’s handler on USA’s “Burn Notice.”

She told AskMen.com, “These lists are a funny thing because there’s not anything I can do to be on it or off of it — so thanks guys, for voting me on it!”

Anna Paquin: Child actress turned vampire lover Anna Paquin was 79th on the list. Paquin was nominated for an Oscar for her supporting role in “The Piano” at the age of 11, and has gone to to stardom as Rogue in the “X-Men” movies, and more recently as Sookie Stackhouse on HBO’s “True Blood.”

Paquin was born in Winnipeg, but moved to New Zealand when she was 4.

Montreal’s Emmanuelle Chriqui is the most desirable woman in the world, according to AskMen.com’s annual reader poll.

The Web site released its 99 Most Desirable Women list on Tuesday and Chriqui, who claimed the top spot, was joined by five other Canadians on the list.

According to the site, six million online votes were cast over a six-week period, and the poll aims to reflect what the “modern man” seeks “in his ideal companion.”

Chriqui is best known for her role as Sloan on HBO’s “Entourage,” who is the on-again, off-again girlfriend of Vincent Chase’s friend manager Eric. The list, ironically, ended with another “Entourage” girlfriend as Jamie-Lynn Sigler, who plays herself as Turtle’s girlfriend on the show, landed spot No. 99.

Chriqui, who ranked 12th on the list last year and 40th in 2008, told AskMen.com, “Hearing what that vote is made of is the biggest compliment of all because it’s not just about being ‘hot’ but about being a well-rounded woman. That’s really empowering — people recognize that I care about other things.”

Five more Canadians made the list, although one-time frequenter of such rankings Elisha Cuthbert of Calgary was nowhere to be found, nor was Vancouver’s Evangeline Lilly.

Malin Akerman: Moving down the list of Canadians, Malin Akerman landed 26th on the list. Akerman wasn’t on the list last year, but popped into the 60th spot in 2008 after appearing with Katherine Heigl in “27 Dresses.” Akerman landed in the No. 4 spot on Maxim’s Hot 100 list last year.

We’re still trying to forgive her for “Couples Retreat,” but Akerman was one of the bright spots of “Watchmen” and “The Proposal.” Akerman was born in Sweden, but grew up in Ontario, where she moved when she was 2.

Grace Park: Actress Grace Park placed 46th on the list after getting some attention at Number Eight on the revival of “Battlestar Galactica” (more from that show in a moment). Park also landed a role alongside Benjamin Bratt on A&E’s “The Cleaner,” which was canceled in September.

Park, who was born in Los Angeles, but moved to Vancouver when she was 22 months old, continues to work in Canada. She’s currently starring in “The Border” on CBC. Park had never made AskMen.com’s list before.

Coco Rocha: Up-and-coming model Coco Rocha, who was born in Toronto but grew up in Richmond, B.C., came in 59th on the list. The model has already established herself as outspoken, having publicly taken stands against eating disorders in the modeling industry and making it know that she doesn’t care much for Paris, which happens to be the fashion capital of the world.

This was Rocha’s first time on AskMen.com’s list.

Tricia Helfer: Another “Battlestar Galactica” star, Tricia Helfer came in 70th place on the list after turning heads as Number Six. Helfer also plays a recurring role as Michael Westen’s handler on USA’s “Burn Notice.”

She told AskMen.com, “These lists are a funny thing because there’s not anything I can do to be on it or off of it — so thanks guys, for voting me on it!”

Anna Paquin: Child actress turned vampire lover Anna Paquin was 79th on the list. Paquin was nominated for an Oscar for her supporting role in “The Piano” at the age of 11, and has gone to to stardom as Rogue in the “X-Men” movies, and more recently as Sookie Stackhouse on HBO’s “True Blood.”

Paquin was born in Winnipeg, but moved to New Zealand when she was 4.